The 4th Trimester

The end of maternity leave is bittersweet.  I am going to miss seeing and holding my baby girl all day long, especially since she seems to do something new and different everyday.  On the other hand, there are definitely days where I am bored at home with a baby and am looking forward to being back at work.  Regardless, I need to celebrate that I survived the dreaded fourth trimester, the three months following pregnancy which are more physically and mentally challenging than the entire nine months of pregnancy.  We made it!  And while there are still things post pregnancy that I miss and can't do (like sleep on my stomach or wear my old jeans), I've come a long way from the early weeks post partum where a mere sneeze would cause me tears and agony.

Not only have I recovered from the physical downsides of having a baby, but after three months of motherhood my confidence has turned around too.  By this point I've changed over 1,000 diapers and done around 1,000 feedings (yup, I did the math).  That expression, "you can do it with your eyes closed"... well, it is not just an expression.  I have fed and changed a baby in the dark in the middle of the night.  I recognize Kate's different cries and know when she's acting hungry or needs a nap.  Of course we still have rough days (and nights), and since she's constantly changing there is always something new to learn or consult Google about my evolving child, but that initial overwhelming feeling has thankfully gone away.

Unfortunately my uninterrupted time with her is ending just as she is starting to develop a little personality and interact more with us.  Her attempts at conversation melt my heart and watching her observe her surroundings and learn new things is fascinating.  I will miss being the first to witness all her milestones.  On Monday I'll join the world of working moms, where I know I'm in good company.  When I look back on my maternity leave much of it was a difficult, sleep deprived blur, but it has also been one of the most wonderful seasons of my life.